My first day in ICU was August 27th (I think). The next day Nurse L. started being my nurse. He was definitely sent by God because he was one of my angels. As I said in my last entry, my mouth was so dry and I couldn’t just drink anything anytime I wanted too. I wasn’t eating either and honestly I didn’t care if I did. I didn’t have an appetite and all I wanted to do was sleep. Nurse L was with me everyday while I constantly had Betsy the BiPap on. I think it was 7 days, maybe 6. I’m just not sure. I lost track of time. A little later on, I pick back up knowing which day it is, but for now I don’t. I don’t remember a lot about the time I spent with him as my nurse but I remember the important things. At this point, my blood sugar was through the roof (because of the massive amount of steroids) and I was getting pricked every hour and was getting medicine and IV bags of medicine all day long so he was in and out a lot (along with techs and other hospital people). Every time he came in, he talked to me about random things…but, he always touched my hand and told me I was doing good, to stay positive, to not get depressed and to keep fighting. He would say, I know this is hard but you can’t let it beat you or get the best of you. You have no idea how those words of encouragement helped me. Being there alone and not being able to talk to anyone for those days was so incredibly hard. I got lots of texts and they were so amazing but to actually hear the words made such a difference. I would just shake my head and cry. I could talk but it was all muffled. Nurse L was very adamant about me getting some nutrition so if he didn’t bring it, he made sure I got an Ensure morning, noon and evening. He asked me what was my favorite and I told him chocolate. It was always in ice and very cold. They would take Betsy off long enough for me to chug it down. My oxygen started dropping as soon as you took Betsy off. I couldn’t stay off of it for more than a minute (if even that long). He also made sure I had water brought in a lot during the day. We did the same with the water. The water would help for a little bit then my mouth and lips would go back to being dry, cracked and miserable. As the days rocked on, nothing changed. My oxygen continued to drop when they took Betsy off and I truly didn’t know if I would ever come off Betsy to the High-flow and that is a scary thought. The Drs that I saw kept saying we are gonna give it a little longer on Betsy the BiPap. I was as high as I could go on Betsy and if it started not keeping my O2 where it needed to be then I would have to be intubated. I sure didn’t want that. I remembered what the respiratory lady had said and I wasn’t ready for that. I am so thankful they continued to leave me on it and so thankful for my angel Nurse L.

During the constant Betsy the BiPap days, I prayed a lot and the one song that I kept singing in my head and sometimes out loud (when nobody was in the room☺️) was Little David. I have always loved that song and it really seemed to fit what I was going through. I was Little David and COVID was my Goliath. I had given the battle to God but I still had to fight. I believe He gave me that song and had it playing on repeat in my head so I wouldn’t forget to keep fighting and he sent me Nurse L so I could hear the words I needed to hear and feel the touch of someone’s hand. I kept fighting but man, it was hard. I pray you never have to experience what I did. A lot of things are hard to put into words and they will just stay with me and God. Thank you Lord for giving me what I needed to fight my Goliath.

LITTLE DAVID

Little David oh so small before Goliath oh so tall. Well the odds were just too high for poor Little David. But he shook off all his load for with the power of God he was bold. He said the battles not mine, I give it to You- Lord it’s thine.

The battles not mine, said Little David, Lord it’s thine I’m in your favor. I’m giving it all to You, I knew not what to do. I’m so glad You let me see You’re really all that I need for the battles not mine, I give it to You- Lord it’s thine.

Well Little David, unafraid before the giant he stood that day – and it seemed to be the end for poor Little David. Just like the lion and the bear he slew, You see Goliath would come down too. He said the battles not mine, I give it to You – Lord it’s thine.

Now Little David he stood tall, and Goliath was made so small. Sweet victory had reigned for poor Little David. Because he gave the battle to One who had a record for getting things done – he said the battles not mine, I give it to You – Lord it’s thine.

The battles not mine, said Little David, Lord it’s thine I’m in Your favor. I’m giving it all You, I knew not what to do. I’m so glad You let me see that You’re really all that I need for the battles not mine, I give it to You – Lord it’s thine.

This may not be the exact lyrics, but how I remember and sing it.

Thanks for taking the time to read my blog. Until next time…. God Bless